A Farmer Revisits His Old Hometown

By guest columnist Foghorn Lee Jones

Howdy there, stranger!

I’ve been away from these parts for a while, and I’ve just come back for a howdedoo.

I can see not much has changed in the Village of Cable TV since I’ve been gone.

You still watch your shows on someone else’s schedule.

Those annoying commercials still pollute your mind.

And that on-screen channel guide is still as ugly as a cowboy’s teeth after 20 years of chew. Truly, it’s got a face only a spreadsheet-masochist could love.

I just do not know how you put up with all that hooey.

Gosh darn, it’s like living in a shack out back of your parents’ farmhouse, getting bossed around with all these ridiculous rules, and curfews, and sanctimonious sermons. Continue reading

An Elegant Device Offers Reprieve from our Paper-Happy Culture

Fujitsu ScanSnap S500MPeople that know me know I hate paper.

I lose it. I forget it in my pants on wash day. I lose it. It gathers in meaningless piles. It blows away when you open the window. It can be dropped and lost. Water ruins it. It can get really heavy in large quantities. It can be misfiled and lost. It rips.

The myth of the “paperless office” has been with us for years, but like a knight in a quest for the grail, I seek that state with undying devotion. Now, thanks to a device I picked up a couple of weeks back, I am much closer to my dream. Continue reading